Tuesday 23 October 2012

Red Boot Lady in Waiting

Red Boot Lady in Waiting... or Training.
I think she might know something I don't.
Meet Sophie.  I met Sophie and her Mom when I was on safari at the mall (remember - I'm not a shopper) looking for the perfect pair of red boots.  I was thrilled when they both kindly agreed to indulge me so I could take a photo of Little Miss Red Boots for my blog.

It was an absolute joy to listen to Sophie sing the praises of her lovely little red boots in her equally lovely British accent while her mother and I tried on the same boots - hers in black, mine in red.

You know what I love about little girls?  They know who they are.  I have vivid memories of being Sophie's age and knowing exactly who I was.  Ask anyone who knew me then - I was the Red Boot Lady before the Red Boot Lady had a name.

I could go on forever about all the things I did when I was little that are markers of how my core personality was always there.  About all of the office supplies I spent my allowance on.  But what I remember most about when I was Sophie's age is that I wanted to be Samantha from Bewitched.  She had everything I could see in my future: a great hairdo, magic, a husband named Darrin, and she could fly.  Samantha had unique presence.  Fast forward my life you know what I got: a great hairdo; and I was married to a man named Darren who my family called Derwood.  Also, I can be a witch from time to time.

Yesterday a friend of mine asked me if he had "unique presence"?  The answer was a resounding "Yes!"  You can imagine the discussion that followed.  I can see he is in that place where he would like to acknowledge his greatness but is still deciding whether or not it's okay to do that.  Just so you know - it is.

Over the years we mentally turn our assets into liabilities based on what other people may have said - or what we think they are saying.  Our independence and creativity is called defiance.  Our voices are too loud, we're too active, too weird, too fat, and too stupid.  Not good enough.  Some of us spend a great deal of energy trying to be thoughtful and quiet; trying to focus on living the way we are "supposed to".  We listen so others feel heard; perhaps making ourselves invisible or untouchable so we can navigate "their" world without realizing that it is, in fact, our own.

My friend is looking back to when he was small and remembering the gifts he already had that were set aside or forgotten so that he could survive in the world he lived in.

I am lucky enough to have people around me who believe in me no matter how crazy I am on any given day.  What I have learned from them is that it's okay to acknowledge our own greatness, and it's also very powerful to acknowledge the greatness in others.  I believe that when we remember that we all have unique presence - when we finally know it and own it - then everything changes.  Everything!

Wouldn't you know it?  My life is filled with magic and I can, indeed, fly!

Will Sophie learn to fly?  Will she own her own business, write books, have children, and dance in her kitchen?  Or will she twinkle her nose and pop off to Paris while her husband is at work?  Who knows.  My greatest wish for her - and all the little girls (and boys) in our world - is that she doesn't wait for the plus in the 40+ to remember that she already has what it takes to pull off a fine pair of reds or to find her voice again.  I hope she remembers that she has unique presence, that magic is everywhere, and that everything she will ever need is already tucked inside those little red boots.

Hmmmm... it would be kinda fun wouldn't it?

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